jamesclark.com

I love you
for too many reasons
So many that I can’t count them all–
I would need to have row upon row of fingers
on a thousand hands
which means I’d need a torso
that is half a mile high
in order to accommodate all my arms
and the sight of me walking down the street
(supported by large trusses on wheels)
would scare small children and make them cry
I love you so much
that it can’t be measured–
If I were to hold my hands apart
and tell you “I love you this much”
my left hand would be here
and my right hand would extend
to the other side of the world
and back around again twice
which would probably hurt a lot
and tear the sleeve of my shirt
(People in France would trip over my elbow
and someone in Beijing would steal my watch)
I will love you
for as long as I live, and even longer–
When the universe has grown tired of
Jay Leno and Tai-Bo and Starbucks and waffle irons
and decides it’s time to implode on itself,
sucking everything inward and crushing it until
there is nothing left, not even dust,
there will be one little speck of light left over
that God will be unable to stamp out
(even with His enormous size 42 billion shoe)
and it will annoy Him so much that He will pull me
down out of Heaven or up from Hell
and smack me for being so persistent
because that indestructable light
will be my love for you
I love you
despite all of these little inconveniences
that wreck my body and tear at my soul–
It will all be worth it
just to see you smile at me
as you hand me an ice cream
cone
– for L

thank you
i am eternally grateful
for the little things you do
that light me up like a christmas
                         tree
thank you for smiling at me
thank you for giving me that look,
you know the one
where you see right through
all the bullshit that i keep at the surface
as if it was all made of glass;
you act as if my shields were not even there
when you peer into my very core
and discover all my weaknesses
all my mistakes, my fears, my sins
and every flaw i have ever tried to hide;
you see it all
and here i stand before you
                         completely naked
                         defenseless
                         ready to die
but instead
of taking advantage
of my vulnerable state
you promise
to
reach out
and wrap me up
                         tight
and never let me
                         go
and i
feel safe
if only for
a little
while
thank you
for giving me
                         hope
                         kindness
                         understanding
                         faith
                         a future
                         joy
                         dignity
                         warmth
when all i
asked for
was your
hand
i will forever be in your
                         debt
please tell me how
i can repay you
and i will spend
the rest of my life
making payments to you
i will sign over the deed to my soul
to you as collateral
i will let you foreclose
on my heart
because it already
belongs to you
                         anyway

The devil came up behind me and poked me in the back…

I wrote this while in a rather piratey mood. It should be sung from the bow of a ship — preferably while drunk — as you look wistfully over the water…

I just got back from a gig at a comic book convention in Los Angeles where I sold copies of my book and belted out tunes on the ukulele…